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Main >> News Listing >> June 2004 >> Article ID 5216
 Esther gives Christina the tongue...On TV? | Type: Internet Article |
| | Madonna declares, `I am Esther' | Jun 18, 2004 | by Malene Arpe
Summary:
...She enthusiastically tongued youngsters Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera on international television.... |
She simulated masturbation, while wearing a wedding dress, at the 1991 MTV awards.
She vigorously fellated an Evian bottle in the documentary Truth Or Dare.
She enthusiastically tongued youngsters Britney Spears and Christina Aguilera on international television.
She brought sado-masochism into the mainstream with a creak of her leather in the video for "Justify My Love."
She posed all hot and bothered with Isabella Rosselini, Naomi Campbell, Big Daddy Kane and Vanilla Ice in the book Sex.
She efficiently emasculated former cutting-edge movie director Guy Ritchie simply by marrying him.
She's ... err ... Esther!??
No offence to people named Esther, but when the news came that über-poptart Madonna has decided to change her name, Esther wasn't exactly what sprung to mind. But on tonight's telecast of 20/20 she says that "I wanted to attach myself to the energy of a different name."
And Esther is it.
No word on whether her current "Reinvention" tour will be renamed the Esthervention.
Apparently, Madonna Louise Veronica Ciccone's recent discovery of the mystical branch of Judaism known as Kabbalah has caused her to rethink her Christian name. Hey, whatever turns your crank, but unfortunately Esther just doesn't work for someone known for envelope-pushing (and licking) performances.
Esthers collect for the United Way. Esthers look after the kids. Esthers knit unattractive cosies you hide away until they come to visit. Esthers do not simulate inventive, acrobatic sex acts in front of millions and provide wet-dream material for teenage boys. Esthers do not pour hot candle wax on Willem Dafoe.
It's just one of those things.
Ma ... Esther's infatuation with Kabbalah, which she describes in the 20/20 interview as being "incredibly punk rock," is one she shares with Demi Moore, Roseanne Barr, Courtney Love and other celebrities. According to a recent news story on the faith, "followers are encouraged to pamper themselves and pursue their own happiness — which may explain why it has attracted so many self-obsessed celebrities."
Mrs. Richie says that ""Kabbalists believe in immortality. They believe that you can overcome death, overcome illness, whatever, so, it's incredibly good to be a rebel."
Esther, according to http://www.behindthename.com, possibly means "star" in Persian and alternatively could be a Hebrew form of Ishtar, the name of a Persian goddess. The Book of Esther in the Old Testament tells of Queen Esther, the Jewish wife of the king of Persia, who saves many Jews from persecution.
So, yes, the biblical Esther was by all accounts a fine and brave woman, but as the chances of the Material Girl being called upon to save the Jews of Persia any time soon appear to be slim, it just doesn't work.
When we tried to look up more recent Esthers who may have nudged some pop-culture ass, we came up kind of empty-handed. The list is pretty much swimming movie star Esther Williams, blues singer Esther Phillips, Maude actress Esther Rolle and, if we stretch wide, Esther Blodgett, Judy Garland's character in A Star Is Born. Not exactly a bevy of nervy pop queens.
Also, according to the American Social Security Administration, Madonna is so rare a name that it is not among the 1,000 most popular in the last 10 years, whereas Esther consistently ranks around No. 300. As an aging pop star, hanging on to your popularity by your muscled, yogaed arms, you do not want a middle-of-the-pack name.
You want to thank whatever God you choose (be it the celebrity-trend God of the moment or someone more traditional) that your parents in their wisdom chose to give you a unique moniker.
Or, if it's a mid-life crisis thing, like the impulse that caused you to write bad children's books and start wearing sweater sets, choose something fun and different and sexy.
Like Apple. Or Coco. Or P.Diddy. Or The Artist Formerly Known As A Kick-ass Broad. |
 Source: Toronto Star | |
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